Archive for humorous

That’s what I do…

Posted in Anne Sexton with tags , , , , , , , on July 11, 2016 by Mj Rains


That’s what I do:

I make coffee and occasionally succumb to suicidal nihilism. But you shouldn’t worry – poetry is still first.    Cigarettes and alcohol follow.

~ Anne Sexton

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Are you prepared?…

Posted in October with tags , , , , , , , , , , on October 30, 2015 by Mj Rains

the-zombie-survival-guideIn case the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse happens soon, it’s time to read up. Max Brooks has the perfect guide…

3_days_survival_kitPick up the survival kit and have it handy. It doesn’t include weapons, so visit Walmart asap…

walking deadBinge watch The Walking Dead episodes starting with episode one, season one, so that you’ll know what to do when zombie hell breaks loose. If possible, when it happens, find one of these guys and never leave him!

Also in preparation, you must have your Zombie Apocalypse theme song. To discover it, go to your mp3 player, ipod or whatever, and hit shuffle on your song files list. Scroll to the third song and hit play… This is mine…

 

Good luck… 😉

 

The malapropisms of Yogi Berra…

Posted in "Wit"icisms" with tags , , , , , , , , , , on September 6, 2015 by Mj Rains

Baseball fan I don’t claim to be…I won’t even try, though I’ve enjoyed a game or two in my time…

In need of a laugh (and while perusing Alphabet Juice by Roy Blount Jr.) I open to the word “malapropism” which isn’t really defined but can be rendered as a “wit-icism” quite naturally…or not…  It is essentially an incorrect word used in place of a word, resulting in an utterance that makes no sense (yet does) in a humorous way. Thanks Wikipedia…

Yogi Berra, of baseball fame, is listed in Blount’s book as a classic candidate for having perfected the art of creating malapropisms…

“If you come to a fork in the road, take it.”

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Diary of a dog…and a cat…

Posted in "Wit"icisms" with tags , , , , , , , on August 18, 2012 by Mj Rains

Found this on Pinterest…so funny!

Did you laugh today?

Posted in "Wit"icisms" with tags , , , , , , , , , , on July 27, 2012 by Mj Rains

Quotes by Steven Wright:

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.

It doesn’t make a difference what temperature a room is, it’s always room temperature.

It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to paint it.

What’s another word for thesaurus?

Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates…When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, ‘Do I know you?’

I used to live next door to a fire hydrant factory. You couldn’t park anywhere near the place.

{click image for artist link}

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