Archive for sex

Folding it in half…

Posted in Books with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 10, 2014 by Mj Rains

pete yorn and scarlett johanssonA short piece from A Visit from the Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan….

Yet each disappointment Ted felt in his wife, each incremental deflation, was accompanied by a seizure of guilt; many years ago, he had taken the passion he felt for Susan and folded in it half, so he no longer had a drowning, helpless feeling when he glimpsed her beside him in bed: her ropy arms and soft, generous ass.  Then he folded it in half again, so when he felt desire for Susan, it no longer brought with it an edgy terror of never being satisfied.  Then in half again, so that feeling desire entailed no immediate need to act.  Then in half again, so he hardly felt it.  His desire was so small in the end that Ted could slip it inside his desk or a pocket and forget about it, and this gave him a feeling of safety and accomplishment, of having dismantled a perilous apparatus that might have crushed them both.  Susan was baffled at first, then distraught; she’d hit him twice across the face; she’d run from the house in a thunderstorm and slept at a motel; she’d wrestled Ted to the bedroom floor in a pair of black crotchless underpants.  But eventually a sort of amnesia had overtaken Susan; her rebellion and hurt had melted away, deliquesced into a sweet, eternal sunniness that was terrible in the way that life would be terrible, Ted supposed, without death to give it gravitas and shape. He’d presumed at first that her relentless cheer was mocking, another phase in her rebellion, until it came to him that Susan had forgotten  how things were between them before Ted began to fold up his desire;  she’d forgotten and was happy – had never not been happy – and while all of this bolstered his awe at the gymnastic adaptability of the human mind, it also made him feel that his wife had been brainwashed.  By him.

Image: Break Up photo shoot with Pete Yorn and Scarlett Johansson

A woman needs to be put in the mood…

Posted in The Deep with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 5, 2014 by Mj Rains

Back Seat RomanceHere is a short piece of advice to all men, lovers, friends, boyfriends and husbands of women out there from The Female Brain by Louann Brizendine, M.D. (make yourself get a copy and read it instead of blaming us for your pitiful lack of understanding…)…

“A woman need to be put in the mood. Before sex, there has to be a soothing and smoothing of the relationship, and she has to be able to stop being annoyed with him. Anger at one’s partner is one of the most common reasons for sexual problems. Many sex therapists say that, for women, foreplay is everything that happens in the twenty-four hours preceding penile insertion. For men, it’s everything that happens three minutes before. Since many parts of a woman’s brain are active at once, she must get into the mood by first relaxing and reconnecting positively with her partner. This is why she needs a good twenty-four hours to get in the mood, and why going on vacation is such an intense aphrodisiac. It allows her to unplug from daily life stress. So men, yes, bring out the flowers, chocolates, and sweet words–they work.  A woman can’t be angry at her man and want to have sex with him at the same time.  And women, tell your men that if they plan on criticizing you or starting a fight on the day they are hoping to get lucky, they should think again.  They will have to wait for the twenty-four hour clock to reset before you’ll be ready.”

Check out this website! 1000 Fights

Image: Jerry Schatzberg/Corbis, 1960


Distorted Sexuality and Winking Etiquette

Posted in Culture, Esoteric with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 15, 2011 by Mj Rains

“I just read a blog post about why sending someone a “wink” on a dating Web site is stupid. This seemed like a reasonable argument to make. But then the blog writer went on to say that in real life, it is “totally unacceptable” to wink. The guy said that if you wink at a stranger in a bar, the stranger would call the police. Is that true? Or is it sometimes OK to wink (in real life)? Should I save it for specific situations? (Which ones?) Georgia

You should believe only half of what you read on the Internet. To my knowledge, winking is neither illegal nor actionable in any county that permits the sale of alcoholic beverages. (I haven’t surveyed the rest.) Like the eye-roll, the wink is a gesture of complicity. Between friends, it means you share a secret. Between strangers, it means you wish you had a secret to share. You shouldyou must!wink whenever the spirit moves you.”

Personally I’ve always found a wink quite alluring, and not really a sexual overture, but just a little indication that the person who sent the wink is on the same page, or shares in your mindset.  Calling the police when winked at?  The person doing the calling would have to be mentally unstable I’d say, just a bit too sensitive, or simply in need of more attention.  Here, Here! I’m a believer in the wink!  Any winking thoughts?

Link: Distorted Sexuality,Winking Etiquette -The Paris Review

Image: Winking Girl by Camilladerrico

Nip Tuck Tonight…

Posted in Television with tags , , , , , , on October 14, 2009 by Mj Rains

NipTuckYes, I cannot wait for the new season tonight on FX…cheesy, I know.  But those nice male bare butts, sexual situations, and some “should be on HBO” language keeps me interested on boring nights.  Mr. Continuum left the audience last season when a woman lobbed off her breast with an electric meat cutter in our fair doctors’ reception room.  Botox injected into a baby’s lips for modeling was another tactless teaser with questionable moral value.  But this is what we tune in for, right? 

When last we left our favorite plastic surgeons, Christian Troy, the “never a dry dick” character,  had just married his long time female employee/friend, settling for her former lesbian self because he was diagnosed with cancer and had 6 months, give or take, to live.  She was someone who he could trust to get him through, plus, she’s a nurse so his egotistic self was assured the best care possible.  The last episode, unexpected yet expected, because, really, can they kill the main guy off?–featured Troy finding out from his doctor that his files had been mixed up–he was not dying, and his cancer was completely gone. 

Can’t wait for the repercussions of this marriage dilemma.  Did I say you could call me cheesy????????

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